"Are you a bachelor?" It's not just the awkward matrimonial sites that are interested in this question. It is also on the top priority questions on many a repulsive housing societies.
Before I start ranting about the negatives, I must say that I am thankful for the many nice societies that treat us (young, unmarried people) as assets and not liabilities. India, is indeed, in many ways proud and grateful to its youth. Our population pyramid is a growing one, thus more productive. It's only the weirdos I'm talking about anyway. Mr Prime minister is single, I hear, anyway.
I had this interesting argument with an older person, who seemed to say that every housing society has rules and interests to take care of. I somehow thought that this was popular public opinion and hence it became interesting for me to logically argue with it. Maybe it will make good entertaining reading for you as well?
The older person (referred to as B in this article hence forth) seemed to think that it was a but obvious rule to make for many societies in Bombay.
Their perspective in their society was to not deal with the chain of problems that came with letting bachelors (used as one word for unmarried people, both female and male) live in the place. It was perhaps the rest of the nations' / governments' / anybody elses' problem to deal with -- not theirs. That's what PGs are made for, anyway. Too bad, he said, but largely, largely, this is the view shared by people with families in the society. This is how we deal with it currently, maybe ten years down the line we might realize there is a better way.
--(I think he is a free markets / liberalization enthusiast. Oh, by the way, caning children to discipline them is also how many teachers think is appropriate in schools. You don't seem to think they should evolve by natural selection and let the problem rest for the next century there, do you? Why that parent-teacher meeting to "sort it out". Also, not a good argument to make for medicine either. If you're ill, you'll weed it out? Let cancer research / progress be - if ideas are to be found, in the future, they will be. Its interesting how one can think that one is not a part of the present time and hence his / her decisions don't really matter. )
But let's discuss these problems he outlined:
1) It is difficult for the society to track who lives in each apartment. When young unmarried people rent an apartment together, there is a constant flux of people who are renting out the place. Let's say three men rent a place out, and one of them gets transferred. So a new person comes in. The turn over cycle for one set of people is almost as low as six months. Who knows if they are compliant with the society norms?
--Check their documents. why is that so hard? Also the onus is on the owner to get the documentations done and verified. Everyone gets an NOC. So what's the problem again?
2) Society members have a day job. They don't have the operational bandwidth to address the security issues that are brought to the table by young unmarried women and men. They are not getting paid extra to do this. Not their circus, not their monkeys.
--Young unmarried women have stalkers in the city. Sure. That can happen (Really! It can!) They are less "secure". Isn't it in your interest to stand by them, than say "who wants to deal with police trouble / thugs / losers etc?" (Ok maybe not, until your daughter / son goes to live in a different city. Then, its suddenly a society issue, right?) If you want a hassle free society, then who needs you as a society "authority" member? Too bad you're lazy. If you don't want responsibility, don't sign up for it. It's like saying "Lets not have old people, disabled people or young unmarried people around. Who wants to protect anyone?"
--A solution is to PAY society members just like you pay security guards. Or get a bunch of people to verify documents and keep things in place.
3) Partying.
--Say What! I wish I had that happening life style you accuse me of. And if I did, hell, why would you be so envious? And please, don't married people and "family" people not throw a get together / party and have some music on? Are they *that* boring?
Keeping the decibel noise low is everybody's responsibility, regardless of age group and marital status. I also might have issues with people conducting music / dance lessons in societies without consulting with their neighbours. What about the loud speaker music during festivities? You didn't ask my permission, did you? That's the thing, we're tolerant with each others' minor party plans - cause we all celebrate once a while.
4) Bringing boyfriends / girlfriends over.
--Ya Khuda! I won't even bother with this one.
It's hard to me to argue with "emotions / bias" against bachelors. It would seem that most of these problems that societies put out can be worked out. It is the highlight of a society's functioning abilities to deal with diversity. Diversity is something to be proud of (pardon my liberal stand on this issue).
But its really obvious that there exist many societies who just seem to want uniformity in their life styles and not want to deal with any of this. They want to live in a place that has just their type of people - two kids, stable job, wife and husband. Whilst they are free to exercise their will, it is also true that they are free by law to exercise their prejudice. I only question if its okay by them, if we all denied them opportunity on the basis of some intrinsic inherent trait of theirs?
So dear B, will you be ok if you were denied a job because your office decided to employ a particular religious sect and you don't qualify? Well, its their office, their rules, right? they just don't want to deal with you. (This is what was not okay with the caste system as well, by the way.) Will it be okay for your children to be denied opportunities in other cities in terms of accommodation because you sincerely believe that its a hassle to rent out to unmarried people? Would it be okay for schools to segregate based on caste, religion, eating habits and colour? Shall we bring all our prejudices out and give it a go?
It is merely the great ego that stems out of a sense of privilege and entitlement, I think, that's at play here. If I owned a house in your housing society, I wouldn't be bothered with your prejudice.
If Only.
Before I start ranting about the negatives, I must say that I am thankful for the many nice societies that treat us (young, unmarried people) as assets and not liabilities. India, is indeed, in many ways proud and grateful to its youth. Our population pyramid is a growing one, thus more productive. It's only the weirdos I'm talking about anyway. Mr Prime minister is single, I hear, anyway.
I had this interesting argument with an older person, who seemed to say that every housing society has rules and interests to take care of. I somehow thought that this was popular public opinion and hence it became interesting for me to logically argue with it. Maybe it will make good entertaining reading for you as well?
The older person (referred to as B in this article hence forth) seemed to think that it was a but obvious rule to make for many societies in Bombay.
Their perspective in their society was to not deal with the chain of problems that came with letting bachelors (used as one word for unmarried people, both female and male) live in the place. It was perhaps the rest of the nations' / governments' / anybody elses' problem to deal with -- not theirs. That's what PGs are made for, anyway. Too bad, he said, but largely, largely, this is the view shared by people with families in the society. This is how we deal with it currently, maybe ten years down the line we might realize there is a better way.
--(I think he is a free markets / liberalization enthusiast. Oh, by the way, caning children to discipline them is also how many teachers think is appropriate in schools. You don't seem to think they should evolve by natural selection and let the problem rest for the next century there, do you? Why that parent-teacher meeting to "sort it out". Also, not a good argument to make for medicine either. If you're ill, you'll weed it out? Let cancer research / progress be - if ideas are to be found, in the future, they will be. Its interesting how one can think that one is not a part of the present time and hence his / her decisions don't really matter. )
But let's discuss these problems he outlined:
1) It is difficult for the society to track who lives in each apartment. When young unmarried people rent an apartment together, there is a constant flux of people who are renting out the place. Let's say three men rent a place out, and one of them gets transferred. So a new person comes in. The turn over cycle for one set of people is almost as low as six months. Who knows if they are compliant with the society norms?
--Check their documents. why is that so hard? Also the onus is on the owner to get the documentations done and verified. Everyone gets an NOC. So what's the problem again?
2) Society members have a day job. They don't have the operational bandwidth to address the security issues that are brought to the table by young unmarried women and men. They are not getting paid extra to do this. Not their circus, not their monkeys.
--Young unmarried women have stalkers in the city. Sure. That can happen (Really! It can!) They are less "secure". Isn't it in your interest to stand by them, than say "who wants to deal with police trouble / thugs / losers etc?" (Ok maybe not, until your daughter / son goes to live in a different city. Then, its suddenly a society issue, right?) If you want a hassle free society, then who needs you as a society "authority" member? Too bad you're lazy. If you don't want responsibility, don't sign up for it. It's like saying "Lets not have old people, disabled people or young unmarried people around. Who wants to protect anyone?"
--A solution is to PAY society members just like you pay security guards. Or get a bunch of people to verify documents and keep things in place.
3) Partying.
--Say What! I wish I had that happening life style you accuse me of. And if I did, hell, why would you be so envious? And please, don't married people and "family" people not throw a get together / party and have some music on? Are they *that* boring?
Keeping the decibel noise low is everybody's responsibility, regardless of age group and marital status. I also might have issues with people conducting music / dance lessons in societies without consulting with their neighbours. What about the loud speaker music during festivities? You didn't ask my permission, did you? That's the thing, we're tolerant with each others' minor party plans - cause we all celebrate once a while.
4) Bringing boyfriends / girlfriends over.
--Ya Khuda! I won't even bother with this one.
It's hard to me to argue with "emotions / bias" against bachelors. It would seem that most of these problems that societies put out can be worked out. It is the highlight of a society's functioning abilities to deal with diversity. Diversity is something to be proud of (pardon my liberal stand on this issue).
But its really obvious that there exist many societies who just seem to want uniformity in their life styles and not want to deal with any of this. They want to live in a place that has just their type of people - two kids, stable job, wife and husband. Whilst they are free to exercise their will, it is also true that they are free by law to exercise their prejudice. I only question if its okay by them, if we all denied them opportunity on the basis of some intrinsic inherent trait of theirs?
So dear B, will you be ok if you were denied a job because your office decided to employ a particular religious sect and you don't qualify? Well, its their office, their rules, right? they just don't want to deal with you. (This is what was not okay with the caste system as well, by the way.) Will it be okay for your children to be denied opportunities in other cities in terms of accommodation because you sincerely believe that its a hassle to rent out to unmarried people? Would it be okay for schools to segregate based on caste, religion, eating habits and colour? Shall we bring all our prejudices out and give it a go?
It is merely the great ego that stems out of a sense of privilege and entitlement, I think, that's at play here. If I owned a house in your housing society, I wouldn't be bothered with your prejudice.
If Only.
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